Fall Feels

I am blessed.
I have a wonderful family.
Both of my parents are still with us, today being my mom's birthday.
My children are doing well. I have a dozen grandchildren.

Today just feels... I don't know... like something is coming to an end.
I feel like the Fellowship's last goodbye at the harbor. (LOTR reference). The individuals lived on, but they were no longer in close fellowship with one another.

Mr C and I have a bit of traveling that is supposed to happen this month, trips to Texas and to Ohio to visit family. Which ever way we travel, we miss those we are without. And yet, we are closer than in the centuries past, when families had little hope of ever seeing their far away loved ones.

Sam is going to Germany the day before my birthday, and will be gone for two weeks. Dan still hasn't heard from the Fire Dept. about an interview. That may happen before the month is over. If he is hired, he could be moving within the next month.
Both my grown up children that remain at home are standing on the edge of the nest. Most people my age have long been empty nesters... and I know the day is coming soon.

Maybe it is that I am finally ready to let go of so much... stuff. Or I think I am ready. I love my property here... but maybe it is just too much for us. Without youngsters to explore the woods, building forts and making trails... what good is it? I can't just go wandering the woods alone any more.
My cupboards are FULL of preserved garden goods. My freezer is full... and that is before we go get half a cow from Becky. Do you know how long a full freezer will last us? Will we be able to use all the canned goods in a timely manner? Why even bother to grow a garden?
Maybe it is that we finally have a HOME, yet it is an empty thing, with my kids all moving away. It ties us here, instead of getting to go where the family is. (Not that I have ANY desire to live in Texas).

It is 85* and humid and it's OCTOBER! My sinuses are ready for the first freeze to take out the ragweed. I think this is a day when I really do need a nap.