Wednesday, November 28, 2012


I'm still around. I still have to blog from the library, because of our outdated browser not being supported by Blogspot. Yes, I could probably update the browser to Google Chrome. But I was told NOT to... and since I no longer have any tech-support children to guide me through the process, I haven't even tried to update the browser.

This week I started keeping one of my former co-worker's little boy. It is supposed to be a temporary job. He is a quiet, cute little guy. Very non-verbal. He growls for "no", and squeals for "yes". (Or unhappy/ happy?) He did manage to say "cracker" for me. My new "days off" are Wednesday and Thursdays.

Dan and Sam have asked if we can switch library to Mondays, so they can concentrate more on schoolwork the rest of the week. Dan may give up working Thursdays as dishwasher, to Sam. This would have them both working two days a week, rather than Dan three and Sam one. When the boys talked to me about it, they said it is as much for Dan's schoolwork as it is for Sam's finances.

I had a nice surprise for Thanksgiving! Tommy came up to see us, from Texas. This is only the second time he has been back to Arkansas since he moved away more than five (?) years ago. Our Thanksgiving dinner was later in the day, as Mr. C had had to work his regular shift. We had a nice meal... and I had to supplement the leftovers Friday to make my turkey pot pie. (The Individuals and I agreed we need to cook another turkey soon, so there is one thawing in the fridge right now!)

I am trying to work my way through some issues deeply imbedded in my brain. Mr. C says I am overly sensitive, and perceive things as snubs, when no malice is intended. I am extemely bothered by such things as being asked along on an outing... and then excluded when the outing occurs. I know much of that is left over from childhood. My step-sister's Aunt had said I could go shopping with my step-sister and her cousins... then never showed up to get me. I was later told they didn't really want me along in the first place. On a couple of occasions, my grandparents were going on a trip and had said I could come along... then 'forgot' to stop by and pick me up.

I was the child with no social skills. I was ALWAYS the last person deeded to whichever team got to 'choose' last. Not once was I ever chosen. So I grew up with some serious self-doubt issues. I think I have overcome this for the most part, but then I run face first into it. I take it 'too personally' when people appear (to me) to go out of their way to avoid me.  If a person has told me I am to be included in something, I do still get upset when I find out that my inclusion was forced upon them- I am again not 'chosen'. Or just plain 'forgotten' when the even took place.

Hey, I'm working on it!
Be sure and hug someone you love today! Thanks for reading.

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